Solvency

It is a heady feeling to have spending money for the first time in more then a year. Well, spending money that isn't specifically earmarked for a particular outing or event. I have some money in my wallet that I could just use on anything I wanted to without first thinking, "Now if I buy a big gulp and a bag of chips, I can't go to the movies with my friends this weekend. Do I really want the big gulp?" I could buy a pop in the vending machine here at work, and it really wouldn't hurt anything. I could also afford to order lunch all week, every week--not that I actually would do that becuase I am kind of cheap bastard when I could just bring my lunch as leftovers or pb&j. I can afford to go to the movies this weekend. I can afford to actually start paying off my credit card debt, and I can still have spending money when I do that.

Okay so the debt paying down will happen very incrementally, and I mean very, teensy tiny increments, but I will be paying it down instead of watching it grow, or merely holding it steady. I had been living such an austere life for so long that this is kind of a rush. I feel like I ought to be cautious not to run out and buy any and every little thing I want. It is a concious choice on my part to stay out of shoe stores and cute boutiques, until the initial rush has passed and I can shop without the overload of a sorority girl and her first vibrator.

It is a relief. I like having the freedom of choice that a little solvency can brings and just in time for the fair weather Chicago.